Will to Live – Lust, Anger, Gluttony & Pride – Part 72

My relationship with her started to get even more serious. Although I was not able to have a relationship with her family, I decided that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her. I gave her an engagement ring in March 2013 and asked her to be my wife. This was the 5th time I had been engaged, the 3rd time in less than 8 months. I guess most of my friends knew I was losing my mind. Down deep, I got engaged to her for all the wrong reasons. I had been through so much of my own money, I felt extremely safe marrying someone that was financially sound. I cared for her and thought I loved her, but honestly, I was in this relationship more for the monetary security and freedom than for what marriage was to stand for, Love, Honesty, & Commitment. On Saturday, July 13th, we decided to get married. We married in a quaint setting in the Countryside. My best friend was my best man and she was escorted by my two grandsons. Even Bluebell stood in the wedding with her Matron of Honor. Our friends from Florida as well as many cousins and friends attended. It was a medium size wedding that we actually split the Cost for our guests. I even had the President of my company at the time and his wife attend from Chicago, IL. It’s funny how you think you know someone after living with them for a while, but she and I both had deep dark secrets. I had a problem with Food, Alcohol, Gambling and smoked a bit of pot. After getting married to her, we began to have some problems, most of the time regarding her daughter. It absolutely bothered me that she did not even attend her mother’s wedding or even acknowledge we were married. We decided to go to the Bahamas right after our wedding. My 3rd wife paid for a wonderful deep-sea fishing trip where I caught quite a few Yellow Fin Tuna. She could honestly see the kid coming out of me. I caught several nice size fish and she paid the Captain to have 4 fish mounted for me. This was kind of an after wedding present or late Father’s Day present for me. We were both having a blast in the Bahamas, Drinking, Eating and Gambling like we didn’t have a care in the world. We returned from our trip and picked up Bluebell from one of the store mangers, whom watched our baby while we were gone. A few weeks later, She suggested we take a trip to Fort Walton Beach, Florida with her girlfriend for a long weekend. It was only about a 6-7  hour drive from where we lived. She decided to rent a 2 bedroom villa for us to stay near the beaches. We had gone to dinner that night at Hooter’s to eat hot wings and actually met one of her kids and their friends. When we returned back to the room, her friend began reading a book and I went outside to smoke a Cigar. About 45 minutes later, I walked back inside and asked where my wife had gone. She said she was going to bed that she wasn’t feeling too well?? So as I newlywed husband of 31 days, I decided to check on my wife. She was in bed and said she wasn’t feeling well. I kept pressing the issue to see what was wrong with her only to realize my new wife had taken an overdose of the sleeping pill Ambient. She was crying pretty hysterical and I immediately called 911. I was in absolute shock and disbelief as to what was going on with her. I was frightened, confused, concerned, and scared not only for her, but what if something serious were to have happened to my Bride of 31 days while we were away on a trip. What would her family would have thought was going on between us. After the Ambulance had come for my wife, they brought her to the nearest ER. After we arrived, I called her sister and also spoke with her brother. After several hours of speaking with family members, they told me this was not the first time she had attempted something like this. I was dumbfounded. I didn’t know what to think. After speaking with the ER Doctor, she had to allow these pills to go through her system, which was going to take between 48 & 72 hours. I instructed her friend to head back to New Iberia with our puppy Bluebell and I would rent a car when we were able to travel back home. I called my company, family and best friend. I was in absolute shock. What in the hell did I get myself into by marrying this lady. I absolutely thought we were very happy. I know her family did not like me, but this was some serious stuff. I had never had this happen to me in my lifetime. I know I aged several years from my wife’s actions. Once she finally detoxed and the drugs were out of her system, we rented a car and had a very quiet ride back home. I was constantly crying  off and on the entire way back. She could not give me a reason why she did this to herself. After we got back from this trip, our marriage was never the same. With all the stuff she purchased including the new house, pool and Bluebell, we were not happy. I finally realized Money could not make me happy. Her money surely didn’t make her happy. We began arguing off and on more than I care to discuss. On several occasions, she asked me to leave her home. I would travel to the Casino and spend a night or two each time I was asked to leave so I would have a roof over my head. During all of this time, I was in contact with my family, friends and finally, I had enough. I decided I was going to pack my stuff up and head back to Saint Petersburg. I could no longer be in this type of marriage with all the threats about getting out of her house. I can remember one time having to call the police because my wife got mad and took all of my clothes and threw them in the driveway and told me to get the F&&K out of her home. I knew then I needed to leave. So I began to search on line and even made a trip back to Saint Petersburg, FL to look for a place to live. Over the past 13 months of living in New Iberia, I had gained over 120 lbs. from all the eating and drinking I was doing with my wife and was slowly approaching 400 lbs. again for about the 5th time in my life.

Will to Live – Anger, Greed & Pride – Part 73

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